Sunday, December 24, 2006

today is christmas--infants look like leaky sacks of lard--i am out of milk

On this Christmas day I am all alone, except for my cat, who is licking himself and not paying any attention to me. I don't mind being alone on Christmas. What bothers me is that my family misses me. They have communicated this through numerous threats of excommunication and emailed, photoshopped images of my head on a spike.

Actually, they have not done any of these things, but I am certain that's what's going through their heads.

I don't like it when anyone's upset by this separation (me/real-world), especially my family members.

Here is a creepy picture of baby Jesus, to remind you that not all things about Christmas are so great and that I, too, was once a fat, ugly baby. Nobody likes fat, ugly babies. You should have kicked me out of the house back then.

Anyway, I also miss you all very much, and my friends back in Boston/New York, too. Sorry I can't be there.



Anonymous Zhao Jingxuan said...

I must confess you something: I've been reading your blog these last days and today I've suddenly realized that I love you and your (perverted) cat. In fact, I just; love your cat, but I think that it's unpolite to tell you directly such a cruel thing. Please, don't hate me:-P.
Merry (laowai) Christmas for you too!!

6:10 PM  
Blogger jird said...

You know it don't feel nice being missed, Kevin. Cut it out!

7:10 PM  
Blogger KMM said...

Sorry, John, can't help it. I've tried to discard my emotions before, but no dice. The world is a harsh, harsh place.

7:18 PM  
Blogger KMM said...

zhao jingxuan, thank you for loving me, or just my cat. he is a slut, and appreciates any and all attention.

7:21 PM  
Anonymous Mom said...

Bring tears to Mama's eyes, sweetie. (Well, not all of it, but the mushy stuff.)

11:12 AM  

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